Whether
a man winds up with a nest egg or a goose egg depends on the kind of chick
he marries.
Trouble
in marriage often starts when a man gets so busy earning his salt, that he
forgets his sugar.
Too
many couples marry for better, or for worse but not for good.
When
a man marries a woman, they become one; but the trouble starts when they
try to decide which one.
If
a man has enough horse sense to treat his wife like a thoroughbred she
will never turn into an old nag.
On
anniversaries, the wise husband always forgets the past-but never the
present.
A
foolish husband says to his wife," Honey, you stick to the ironing,
cooking, and scrubbing". No wife of mine is going to work.
The
bonds of matrimony are a good investment, only when the interest is kept
up.
Many
girls like to marry a military man- he can cook, sew, and make beds, and
is in good health, and he's already use to taking orders.
Eventually
you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start
bragging about it.
The
older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Some
people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know
"why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the
roads weren't paved.
How
old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?
When
you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to your youth... remember
about Algebra.
You
know you are getting old, when everything either dries up or leaks.
I
don't know how I got over the hill without getting to the top.
One
of the many things no one tells you about aging is that it is such a nice
change from being young.
Ah,
being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Old
age is when former classmates are so gray and wrinkled and bald, they
don't recognize you.
If
you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at
when you are old.